My Fake Stalker

I’ve never had a real stalker, but then again, I guess he wouldn’t be a very good one if I knew about his existence.  I did have a fake stalker once though. It just might have been one of the silliest things I was even involved in. There must have even been a certain level of believability to what we did because an elderly woman did look quite concerned on my behalf.

When my husband was still in college, I came to visit him at the student gym where he worked. This was a regular Friday night routine. He is normally a little bit more than your average goofball, but this night he was really on a roll.

I was down by the equipment cage waiting for him when I heard someone from the walkway above yell, “Hey, good looking! You got a boyfriend?” This is not at all an unusual thing for him say so I answered with a caustic, “Won’t you leave me alone? How many times do I have to tell you? You need to stop following me.”

We continued our banter for a few more turns until I realized that one of the women on the same level as me was beginning to look extremely worried on my behalf. I became afraid that if we did not show her we were simply goofing around she would take action on my behalf.

I told my husband to come down and we made a bit of a show over the fact that we really did know each other and were together. I never did figure out if that lady looked more relieved that I was safe or upset that we would be so callous.

I felt that the situation had all arisen in good fun and that there was nothing to worry about. To this day, whenever my husband bumps into me, like if I’m walking into the house as he is pulling into the driveway he still asks, “Hey, good looking. You got a boyfriend?” and I must admit that every time it still makes me smile and I secretly hope that he never stops.

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